8 And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the LORD God called to the man and said to him, “Where are you?” 10 And he said, “I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.” 11 He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” 12 The man said, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.” 13 Then the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this that you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” Genesis 3:8–13

Have you ever played the blame game? Of course, you have! We’ve all done it. Even if we can’t remember, at some point our four-year-old selves pointed a finger at an innocent brother, sister or friend and said, “It’s not my fault—she did it!” Why do we do that? Why can’t we take ownership of what we do or say when we are wrong? We are human—flawed, as we can all agree. and, therefore, inherently flawed. So, isn’t it expected that we mess up every now and then?

Adam blames Eve, Eve blames the serpent and the serpent blames God. Adam was quick to blame Eve for his involvement in their sin, and as the man God created to be the leader, he failed miserably. Ultimately, together, their sin led to the fall of all mankind, and their sin is the reason we continue with the same games! Because Adam and Eve sinned against God, our nature to sin and play the blame game is inherently in us.

There are many reasons we blame others for our actions: not wanting to take responsibility, feeling embarrassed, fearing the consequences, worrying about what others might think, past trauma and insecurities—the list goes on. Sometimes, we blame a person, a coworker, a spouse or a family member. Other times, we blame circumstances such as addiction, a failing marriage or missed opportunities. In the end, we often choose the path of least resistance by pointing the finger elsewhere. We can’t hide our sins from God, nor can we trick Him into believing us when we shift the blame. However, here’s the good news: God knows we aren’t perfect. His desire is for us to be made perfect with Him in eternity one day, which is why He sent Jesus. We can run to Him, carrying our sins and shame, falling on our faces and saying, “Yep, You know it was me, Lord—I did it, and I need Your help now more than ever.”

God doesn’t want our excuses. He already knows every excuse we could ever come up with. Making excuses and pointing fingers are the opposite of what 1 Corinthians 16:13–14 says about standing firm in the faith. If you are a wife, love your husband with humility and grace—own your mistakes and failures. If you are a daughter, be loving and respect your parents’ authority—own your mistakes and failures. If you are a boss, lead by example and show that you aren’t perfect by owning your mistakes and failures. If you are a co-worker, lead by example, help others and work together. And don’t be afraid to show them your mistakes, too!

And I understand—it’s not easy. Maybe your spouse isn’t doing his part, and your circumstances are less than ideal. Or perhaps you have the worst boss in history, and you can’t even understand how they became your boss. Or maybe you’re being held back by an addiction, and you’ve tried everything to stop—using all the excuses and finger-pointing. God gets it. He sees your mistakes and failures, and He says “Bring it—bring it all to Me.” He calls all of us, in every walk of life, to run to Him.

Instead of blaming, choose strength. Stand firm in the faith and ask God for the strength to do what is right. Ask God for strength to have that difficult conversation or make that tough decision. Be the example others can look to as we navigate this life together. It’s the harder path, but we know we’re not doing it alone. I sometimes wonder what this world would be like if Adam and Eve had chosen to own up to their sin from the beginning instead of placing blame. Maybe childbirth wouldn’t hurt; God may have shown some mercy there. Who knows?

Think about this: what if you owned up to your sin instead of playing the blame game? It may be painful at first, and it could be a long road to healing. But ultimately, it would lead to freedom—freedom from guilt and shame, freedom from lies and manipulation, freedom from addiction, restored marriages, mended relationships, better work environments and so much more.
Whatever it looks like for you, remember God’s promise to us in Hebrews 13:5–6: 5 Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” 6 So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?”

God, we are all sinners in need of a Savior. Thank You for sending Your Son to save us from ourselves. God, we are not perfect, and we mess up all the time. Thank You for Your grace and mercy every day. Soften our hearts and help us to own our faults and bring them to the feet of Jesus. Amen