Key Scripture:

Ecclesiastes 3:12-13 – “I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil – this is God’s gift to man.”

Devotional:

Ecclesiastes 3 starts by telling us, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.” It then proceeds to give us detailed examples, a time for this and a time for that, as a setup for a series of statements regarding perceptions. In verses 12-13, I hear the author saying, “So if all this stuff I just told you is true, then why in the world are you overthinking your life and choosing to allow circumstances to define you?”

It’s a great question. Why do we do that, even in light of holding absolute truths in our hands? Why is it so difficult to take the information given to us, intellectually agree that it’s a good idea, and then struggle so hard to actually adopt it? In Romans 7, Paul says, “For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” This is not a new challenge. We are not alone in it, and it is not just a problem of today’s culture.

For me, as a husband of 22 years and father of three boys knocking on the door of adulthood, joy has been a tough feeling for me to navigate over the years, and joyfulness has been a tough emotion to express. Not that I don’t feel it (I do), but rather that I have a difficult time expressing it in most situations. It makes me feel exposed, makes me feel foolish at times and leaves me feeling judged and vulnerable. And it’s all rooted in sin, pictured in Adam and Eve attempting to hide from God (Genesis 3), Peter weeping after denying Jesus the third time (Matthew 26) or you and I doing any number of things to ensure people think we’re cool or have our stuff together.

What if one day we magically woke up and were just able to do the next right thing, in Jesus’s name, and be fully content knowing that it will all work out just fine? What if we literally did not desire idols but rather desired the fruit of the Spirit? What if we stopped believing that we are being judged by man around every decision, every outfit, every use of a dollar, every career path, every health crisis odr every circumstance? What if we could stop feeding everyone’s shame and start living abundantly and free? For a lot of us, this is a possibility that is hard to grasp. Our days are filled with critics and critiques, probably coming worst from the one looking back at us in the mirror.

But this is not the life that Jesus has for us. Ecclesiastes 3 makes it clear that God’s gift to man is “to be joyful and to do good as long as they live: also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil.” This is a tough thing to do if our lives are filled with worry, fear, shame, anxiety, disbelief and judgment. In that case, it seems the best we can do is chase fleeting moments of happiness over, and over and over again.

In my early thirties, I was going to a job that I believed made me miserable. I felt unseen, unheard and unconsidered. I worked in an office in the corner and did a job that didn’t require a lot of human contact; therefore I was rarely contacted by humans. I found myself bitter about my career and slowly giving in to apathy. It was almost comfortable to do so, and then I realized I had a choice! I had a choice of how to approach my days, approach my career, approach myself and approach my Savior. I had a choice of what to believe about my circumstances and relationships. I had a choice to begin doing the next right thing, and so I did. I didn’t leave that job. Rather, I approached it differently, got out of my office every day, introduced myself to people, learned about their families, shared meals with them, watched soccer together and genuinely enjoyed the next four years there.

It’s a picture of what we have available to us in Christ Jesus, not just for eternity, but also while we are here and in our marriage. In Him, there is no shame. There is no requirement to fade away. There is no need to hide. In Psalm 139, we are reminded that God made us for purpose, not accident, and in Galatians 5, Paul reminds us that we are no longer slaves, but rather free and never again required to be burdened by the yoke of slavery!

So, when you look in the mirror today, see a free person, released by the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Be released to do good as long as you live, eating and drinking and taking pleasure in all your toil! Share your joy and do it without shame.

Deepening questions:

•  How do you genuinely express feelings and/or express joy? Does your spouse recognize this in you?
• Do you find yourself holding back your joy within your marriage or have difficulty expressing it? Have you ever discussed that together?
• Where in scripture can you find examples similar to you? (e.g., do you identify more with Peter feeling shame over denying Jesus in Matthew 26, or more with David dancing before the Lord in 2 Samuel?)

Further reading:
Genesis 3:1-13, Matthew 26:69-75, Psalm 139, 2 Samuel