Key Scripture:

Ecclesiastes 3:6a – “a time to seek, and a time to lose;”

Devotional:

I have this recurring dream where I find myself standing in front of a large black and brown wall filled with patinated levers all begging me to pull them. In this dream, each lever represents a pathway in life. One lever may mean a high-paying career and two-story home in the mountains. One lever may mean living homeless and alone on the streets. There are many options, many pathways and many possible results. In my dream, I am frozen, scared to decide and potentially have it been wrong. It’s not a dream, it’s a nightmare, for I am completely aware of my inability to make perfect choices.

The world causes this. Emphasizing a spirit of fear, I am consistently coaxed into believing that my circumstances define me, that there is a worldly solution to my problems. Even worse, I am convinced that my circumstances are typically a direct result of my own decisions and efforts, or lack thereof. It’s a dangerous game to play. To place my pride and ego at the mercy of my life “going well” against the devastation and sadness of my life “going badly” can tear me apart at the seams, and likely will. It’s a game I cannot win and makes me a victim to daily events. Can you relate? What should we do about it? Give up? Do nothing? Do everything? Work our fingers to the bone? Lay back and do our best to enjoy life while we have it? Work hard and hope that we somehow make it safely to the end? Does anyone make it safely to the end? What’s the right way to live?

A time to seek and a time to lose speaks to the rhythms of an existence given to us by God. Yes, there is no doubt He built us to work, to seek knowledge and understanding and to express those learnings in physical and mental outpouring. Throughout Scripture, God makes it clear that we are to take care of the earth and all that has been given to us (Genesis 2). Additionally, we are informed of the perils of laziness and apathy, the results of which include sinful behaviors, self-hatred and a turning away from our Creator. We are to plant, grow and cultivate daily, expending ourselves with acts of obedience, servanthood and worship. Work hard. Seek consistently.

However, scripture also speaks of times when we must let go, for to trick ourselves into believing that our own physical efforts will produce preferred circumstances and spiritual maturity is to forego the promises of God and the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want that weight…I simply cannot bear it. So, as much as we must be open to seeking, we must also be open to losing, to accepting that the results of our work may not always be our preference. It is in those moments where I am greatly challenged. And yet, the true freedom in life comes from letting go, surrendering that which I cannot control to He who has full control over all things.

As a husband for over 22 years, there are countless moments where I’ve wished my intentions and efforts equaled different results. I spent months searching for our first home just to watch it burn down six months later. I spent five years getting a degree that was no longer useful in an economic downturn. I spent thousands on vacations that I hoped would make people happy with me. I read all the books about how to be a better man, spouse and father just to watch myself fail at all those over and over again. And I have asked myself many times over those years whether the energy required to do these things is worth it. And the answer is a resounding “yes!” Why? Because within the work is love, obedience, effort and worship, and regardless of how these things turn out, the journey towards them is what life is actually about, way more than any preferred and resulting circumstance.

Jesus asks His disciples to let go of everything and follow Him, and it is in this following that there is peace. So, I encourage you to follow, and follow with everything you have. All of it. Seek daily, learn well and work hard. But I also encourage you to let go of the idea that your efforts somehow equal your happiness in life. While you may have moments where your efforts seem to physically define your circumstances, your circumstances will never define your life. Only God gets to do that.

Deepening questions:

• As a married couple, have you ever discussed the connection between circumstances and happiness? How would you respond to each other if circumstances changed? Where in Scripture would you turn?
•  Is there a certain physical image for your marriage that you are chasing or are you chasing Jesus together? What would it look like to follow Jesus together more closely?

Further reading:
Genesis 2, 1 Peter 5:7, Jeremiah 29:11