Key Scripture:

 Ecclesiastes 3:3b – “a time to break down, and a time to build up;”

Devotional:

Parenting encompasses both deconstruction and construction. There are moments when we need to “tear down” wrong beliefs, destructive behaviors, or wrong attitudes. In scripture there are several instances where Jesus does these things. In the cleansing of the Temple account (Matthew 21:12-13, Mark 11:15-17, Luke 19:45-46), Jesus enters the temple in Jerusalem and overturns the tables of the money changers and the seats of those selling doves. He condemns the commercialization and exploitation taking place in the sacred space, emphasizing the importance of the temple as a house of prayer. In the Sermon on the Mount ( Matthew 5-7): Jesus challenges traditional beliefs and interpretations of the Law. He deconstructs the understanding of righteousness based solely on external observance, emphasizing the importance of inner attitudes and motives. Jesus highlights the need for love, forgiveness, and reconciliation, rather than retaliation and vengeance.

In parenting there are times when we need to provide guidance and direction on what our children could and could not listen to and why. Or who they could and could not hang out with and why.  We really try to not give the reason “because we said so”, unless it is something concerning their immediate safety, because we want them to understand why we are making the decision. All with the hope that one day, when they are faced with a similar decision and we are not there to make it for them, they will remember their beliefs and know without a doubt why they believe what they believe. Take the time to have the hard conversations and correct in love.

It is crucial to discern when to “build” up our children’s confidence, self-worth, and faith. As a teacher and coach of 2 boys, I have learned to not harp on the negative aspects right after their performances whether it be school, or sports, but to focus on the good things that happened, or what they did right, and to work on the things that need improvement later. There are several instances where Jesus “builds” us up in scripture. In John 13:15, Jesus said, “I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” As we study His life and imitate His actions, we are built up in character and learn how to love and serve others. Through His promises, Jesus provides us with promises that give us hope. In John 14:2-3, He assures His disciples, “My Father’s house has many rooms, if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.” Jesus promises us eternal life and the hope of being with Him forever.

Questions for reflection:

• How does the concept of God’s timing influence your parenting decisions? In what areas of your life do you struggle to surrender your plans and desires and instead trust in God’s perfect timing for your child’s growth and development?
• Reflecting on your parenting journey, can you recall a time when you recognized the need to tear down certain negative influences or behaviors in your child’s life? How did you approach this situation, and what were the outcomes?